Coyoty (coyoty) wrote,

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RIP Onyx, 4/?/1992-1/17/2009

Today I ordered my cat be put to death.  I know the polite euphemism is "put to sleep", but it still feels like I had her murdered for selfish reasons.  When I brought her to the vet this morning because she wasn't eating, she was diagnosed as having liver and heart problems, and needing to be hospitalized to run tests and to force her to eat through a tube.  The estimate for hospitalization was about $1600.  At her age, she also had a good chance of having other geriatric problems like cancer and kidney disease, so even if I could afford to prolong her life, it wouldn't be such a good one.  Or so I tell myself because my guilty side tells me I had her euthanized for my sake, not hers, to save money and trouble taking care of her.  It's not easy to have a companion of almost 17 years killed.
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